June 7, 2012

Job hunting: I know there's one out there somewhere...

Today I went "job hunting", or more realistically, I browsed Craigslist for 4 hours. You're probably thinking, 4 hours is a long time. Who would ever want to spend 4 hours online, looking at post after post of potential job opportunities that all seem to be *~Fake Promises of Making 1,000 bucks a day~* or total dummies looking for more dummies to join their dumb crew? Well, that person is me. The person who would want to do that, I mean. And after all that, I ended up with one (1) job lead.

I like to think of all applications as a challenge. They don't think I will fill out that application unless I am totally qualified for the job and think I can handle the responsibilities. Oh-ho-ho, are they wrong. I will fill out any application I can get my hands on, more because the blank spaces with easy questions like "Name?" and "Date of birth?" tempt me so much I can't resist. But also because there is a chance, however small, that I might be that lucky person who turns in an application and just gets hired because the manager is too stressed or apathetic to care who works there.

Think of this scenario.

At a successful business, the manager is having a stressful day. Like, really stressful. His kid is suspended from school for having a hit list, he forgot to pack a lunch, and his tire went flat on the way to work. Okay, so imagine this guy (or girl) is supposed to be in charge of hiring the new assistant at the office. He could obviously care less about this new employee, who they are, or when the last time they bathed is. My application, thoughtlessly filled out and sitting so prominently right on top of the stack, catches his eye in the middle of him banging his head repeatedly on the desk. He stops and picks it up. No felonies...no weird past jobs...a female...aww, hell. I'll hire her. She seems nice enough. She deserves $80,000 a year.
Maybe it's unlikely, but it could happen. I'm just waiting for it.

So this single job lead I ended up with would work nicely for the summer. I would be working 15-20 hours a week. My daughter would stay home with Michael or my mother-in-law while I worked. And it would give me a chance to get out of the house and make some money (feel worthy again). I'm waiting to hear back from the owner of the business, so I hope she doesn't read this and decide I'm an unfit employee. Thank God my blog isn't popular.

It would be REALLY nice to get paid for writing this. So if any of you have extra money lying around (especially the kind from the commericials with the eyes and the "Somebody's Watchin' Me" music), feel free to literally throw it at me. You don't even have to say it's for my blog.


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